Are you up against a divorce bully?

Your spouse has never really acted aggressively toward you before, but that all changed when you filed for divorce. Now your spouse has been bullying you and trying to take control of the divorce, twisting the process to their own advantage.

You may be facing a divorce bully, and the split actually brings out these tendencies. They attempt to intimidate you and get what they want out of the divorce. You need to know exactly how to deal with it.

First of all, be honest about what’s happening and work to set up boundaries with your spouse. Many bullies are not nearly as secure or as brave as they pretend to be, so this push-back may be enough to put an end to things.

Next, if the bullying does continue, start tracking it. Get a notebook and write down the events, the dates, the times, the people involved and everything else. These records can help you if you get to court and your spouse has clearly crossed a line.

You also want to keep as much hard evidence as you can. Save text messages. Save email messages. Talk to witnesses and get written statements.

Be especially wary if you feel like things may turn physical. Not all bullying situations do, but domestic violence is a very real problem in the United States. Learn what signs to watch out for and how you can protect yourself.

Throughout this entire experience, make sure you know all of your legal rights. The bully may try to get their way, but you can still stand up for your rights and trust that the legal system is on your side.