Divorce may nullify the marital ties between spouses, but it does not end their parenting responsibilities. Many divorced parents in Orange County, California, opt to share the custody of their children through co-parenting. However, they should not use parenting time to badmouth the other spouse.
Divorce is an emotional process. If the parents act negatively toward each other, it can affect their children. Bitterness can also put their children in an awkward situation because it can make them feel that their parents are making them choose a side.
When discussing the other parent, it is important to keep calm. Badmouthing and putting the blame on an ex-spouse does not help. Being mindful about one's choice of words and how they are delivered can help children understand why their parents got divorced. Being honest and assuring them that their parents' decision to divorce had nothing to do with them can put their minds at ease and foster trust. If discussing the other parent feels uncomfortable, it is best to set boundaries.
Parents should know that divorce is also emotional for their children. It is important for both divorced parents to constantly remind their children that they are loved, even though the marriage ended. Using a child as a pawn in a bitter divorce does not benefit anyone.
Child custody is one of the most important issues in a divorce and it can be vital for maintaining a healthy relationship between parents and their children. Both parents have clearly defined roles for promoting their children's well-being. If a divorced parent feels that it will be beneficial to modify a child custody arrangement, then it is important to seek sound legal advice.
Source: The Stir, "What to Do When Your Ex Makes the Kids Think You're the 'Bad Guy'," Jenny Erikson, Jan. 21, 2014